Happy Thanksgiving!

In this time of high unemployment, Catholic education in this Archdiocese in turmoil, and the Church under attack in many areas, there are still things to be thankful for.

Take a moment to THANK GOD for those things.

And now, for a little humor, sent to me (and many others) from Melvin.

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A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said, 'You have been a good cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking.'

The cat thought for a minute and then said, 'All my life I lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on.'

God said, 'Say no more.' Instantly the cat had a huge fluffy pillow.

A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident and they all went to Heaven together. God met the mice at the gates with the same offer that He made to the cat.

The mice said, 'Well, we have had to run all of our lives: from cats, dogs, and even people with brooms! If we could just have some little roller skates, we would not have to run again.' God answered, 'It is done.' All the mice had beautiful little roller skates.

About a week later, God decided to check on the cat.. He found her sound asleep on her fluffy pillow. God gently awakened the cat and asked, 'Is everything okay? How have you been doing? Are you happy?'

The cat replied, 'Oh, it is WONDERFUL. I have never been so happy in my life. The pillow is so fluffy, and those little Meals on Wheels you have been sending over are delicious!'

Recall Notice (A Little Humor)

The Maker of all human beings (GOD) is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart.

This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect has been technically termed "Sub-sequential Internal Non-Morality, " or more commonly known as S.I.N., as it is primarily expressed.

Some of the symptoms include:

1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion

The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this defect.


The Repair Technician, JESUS, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.

The number to call for repair in all areas is: P-R-A-Y-E-R.


Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, Jesus, into the heart component.

No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:

1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness

9. Self control

(these are the "Fruits of the Holy Spirit")

Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Believers' Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these fixes.

WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded. For free emergency service, call on Jesus.


DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Paradise so as to prevent contamination of that facility.


Thank you for your attention!


GOD


P.S. Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice, and you may contact the Father any time by 'Knee mail'.


Because I AM

Are you a Graduate St.Jude Elementary School?

The folks over at St. Jude's are really trying hard to ensure that they reduce any debt and stay open for many years to come. I applaud them for it.

An email was forwarded to me regarding the current situation.

I will not reproduce it here but they are looking to contact as many alumni as possible. Even if you are a parent or even grandparent of a graduate, and are interested in helping, please contact Trish Young at pappyandtrish@juno.com.

Thank you.

Reminder, DO NOT GIVE TO CCHD Collection Sunday!

First, I would like to take this opportunity to ask everyone who may read this blog to keep in mind the parishioners, parents and students at the various schools we have discussed over the last week or so. For them, it is a very hard time. A time of shock. A time of disbelief. And for some, it may even shake their faith in the Church.

So, I would ask everyone, if you remember, to please offer up the Sunday Mass for them.

Again, this Sunday is CCHD Sunday and it is time again to send a message to the Conference of Bishops that we will no longer fund non-Catholic organizations, especially those who work against us.

In the past, I have asked you to take the funds that you would give to CCHD and not to spend it on adult beverages or the movies, but to give it to a good Catholic Charity. This year, give it to the nearest Catholic School and ask that it be used for a family who is having a tough time paying the tuition.

Seven Schools in "Consultation"

Melvin's wife, Irma, came by and dropped off her copy of the Catholic Standard.

According to the Standard (and it wasn't the cover story even), there are SEVEN schools in "consultations" due to the declining enrollment and financial challenges. Now, we can't say there is a possibility of closing or merger because what you read on the blogs are rumors, as Superintendent Patricia Weitzel-O'Neill told the St. Catherine audience the other night.

The schools are:

• St. Hugh of Grenoble (Greenbelt)
• St. Jerome (Hyattsville)
• St. Mark the Evangelist (Hyattsville)
• St. Michael (Ridge)
• St. Michael the Archangel (Silver Spring)
• St. Jude (Rockville)
• St. Catherine Laboure (Wheaton)

How many of these will be around after June? St. Jude's will probably be around, given the fact that St.Catherine is just a couple of miles down the road. St. Michael the Archangel may have their students go to Our Lady of Sorrows in the People's Republic of Takoma Park or one of the other nearby schools. The schools in Hyattsville and St. Hugh may be merged into one. Maybe that is the Trinity?

If your child goes to a school with low enrollment, you had better be prepared for one of these "consultations" next year. My source tells me that there are as many as "seven" on the list for "consultations" for next year.

Correction: One of my readers pointed out that Our Lady of Sorrows was taken over by Christo Rey. He/she is correct.

Update: This story now appears on the Catholic Standard website, in case you decide not to get a paper copy.